What is your immediate reaction when I ask what is the condition of your heart?
For those who feel their hearts are trapped or even dead, God has not given up. Don’t you give up. In the “trenches” that is hard to see sometimes. But I recently received through a dream the gift of seeing where my heart was many years ago and where it is now. I share this dream with you as I wrote it in my journal which I thought would be just for me. But now my Heavenly Father is asking me for the courage to trust Him to use this dream in your life for His good purpose.
- At the beginning of the dream I am in a house just “living my life” – busy doing what is expected of me. I discover a small, ferret-looking, scrawny dog and wonder why did my husband bring this dog home?
- My best friend comes over. I am interacting with her and she notices the dog. She is quite concerned. Points out to me how dry and pale its nose is; how skinny it is and looks basically like its dying from neglect. At first I act surprised but then I blurt out “that’s because I’ve been ignoring it. I don’t know what to do with it or where it came from. I don’t know why my husband brought it here.”
- The scene changes and my friend and I are on a trip. I’m looking at the trip from a business perspective of “what do I need to get done”. My friend is taking in all the beauty, luxury, comforts and opportunities of the place. The dog is with us at my friend’s insistence. Everyone keeps calling the dog “he” and I’m surprised how passionately I correct them. I am becoming enthralled with the dog, watching her beauty grow as I interact with her. She is growing at an amazing rate. Looks something like a beautiful golden doodle.
- I feel pretty lost at the resort. My friend seems right at home. I’m trying to keep the dog “under control” so she doesn’t get in trouble or bother people.
- At one point the dog sees an archery field and someone shooting a bow and arrow. As soon as the arrow hits the target the dog leaps into action charging the target and removing the arrow in one clamp of its teeth and swing of its head, returning the arrow to the person that shot it. I’m stunned and so are the people around me. I don’t let my surprise show. Instead I say “she is very well trained you know” while wondering who taught her that?
- The scene changes again. There is some sort of evening event. I’m feverishly looking for somewhere to kennel the dog. What I find looks like a 3rd rate day-use motel and I just can’t leave her there, even though I do consider it.
- I go outside and it is dusky dark. I can’t find a path to wherever it is I need to go to get ready for the evening. I see the path I think I need and it is quickly being overcome by a deep tide rushing in with a strong current. I look at the dog and ask her can we make it? But even as I do the path becomes completely consumed by the tide. I am at loss to know what to do when I hear my friend’s voice “do you need help?” I wake up.
Revelation of the dream’s meaning:
- I know the dream is about my heart because dogs have always represented my heart in my dreams. I hear “this dream is the journey of your heart over many, many, many years”.
- Jesus (my husband) brought “my heart home” 42 years ago and I (i.e. my intellect) pretty much did ignore it for 26 years – until 1998 when Holy Spirit (my best friend in the dream) started pointing out to me the condition of my heart. It brings tears to my eyes as I realize the starkness of the neglect; my cruelty out of fear and just not knowing what to do with my heart; and, my disdain for it. I was so consumed by performance, production, perfection and had no time for my heart. I have been so surprised by my heart as I’ve paid more and more attention to it.
- The scene in the dream where the dog bounds in to action to remove the arrow … could that be a more dynamic picture of my passion for inner healing and how no matter what is going on, because of the way You have made me and trained me, I see the arrows hitting the hearts around me and bound in to remove them and to return the arrow to the one who shot it – the enemy. Recognizing both where it belongs and who is responsible for the shot. (John 10:10).
- There are still areas of my life where my first tendency is to kennel (i.e. lock-up) my heart, but I’m getting to the place of no … I just can’t do that. The path to where I need to go to rest and prepare for what is next is now covered by the flood of Your Presence where it has rolled into my life and the familiar paths are gone. But the Holy Spirit is there – asking me if I need help to move on to the next place.
YES. I absolutely do. Thank You, Holy Spirit, for asking, for being with me, for Your incredible patience, persistence and endurance with me. Thank You to my beautiful, incredibly strong heart for enduring all I put you through. I’m so sorry for how I treated you. I’m amazed how you survived. I am thrilled by your beauty, strength and what our Heavenly Father has designed you and trained you to be. No more kenneling.
I have no clue what is next but I’m ready and excited to step into the flood of the waters of life from Abba’s throne. (Revelation 22:1) with Your help Holy Spirit.
Back to my original question – what is the condition of your heart? How are you treating your heart?
My prayer for you is that you would make the choice to ask our Heavenly Father to reveal to you things you have never known about your heart, but He has known since before the beginning of time. (Ephesians 1:4-5)
This gallery contains photos of the vessel my Heavenly Father
used to teach me so very much about my heart